Last night I had this dream validating why I haven’t heard from “Major-ly Married.” In this dream I discovered he was in town and I found a marriage license in his apartment. The dream was so vivid, there was a lot of yelling and I feel like it provided closure and the cutting loose of my hopes from hearing from him again.

I had two solid dates with this guy the end of October. He definitely was good on paper. A Major in the military, 32 years old, close to his family, got his doctorate from a pristine University in Europe and now a professor at a University in NY state. I come from a military family so his background definitely intrigued me and I appreciated he was from below the Mason Dixon line. He was very formal, articulate, educated and endearing. He also lives in a condo building on Central Park West directly across the park from me. Walk out his door and there’s Central Park. Classiest #walkofshame ever.

We met on OkCupid and his first line to me was regarding how I say “y’all” and he says “sir” and how both of us get looks here in the city using these terms. After a few messages exchanged he asks for me number and then actually CALLS. Now this is rare for a guy to call. Rare like getting a taxi in the rain on 42nd St. kind of rare. Once we finally touch base we have a great conversation (he had that Southern twang so I was hooked), realize we are both free THAT night so we go out. So, “Major” ventures across Central Park to meet me at a tapas place, Soujourn, on the Upper East Side. He was adorable when I walked in. Tan sweater over a button up, probable about 5’9”, blonde hair and blue eyes. Just my type. We had great conversation and he was such a gentleman. I was smitten and even prematurely texted my Ginger Friend that I could marry him. He had two glasses of wine and I enjoyed a glass of wine and then was craving a dirty martini. But, ordered it with Tito’s Vodka (Texas represent) and the bartender delivered it as a “Dirty Tito.” Love. After almost an hour and a half he mentioned how he had some friends from when he lived in Germany in town and he didn’t want his night to end with me so he invited me to come with. I wasn’t too keen on meeting friends right away but he was insistent.

So we took a cab to a German beer hall in midtown. It was very chill and I chatted with one of his good friends who was praising his friend and what a good guy he is. After an awful grapefruit beer (I commend him for getting me something fruity) he feels pretty bad for taking me to a beer hall so we take a cab to the Upper West Side to Burke and Wills Speakeasy. Casual ploy to get me on his side of the park – sneaky bastard. This Speakeasy is amazing! I had the best cocktail ever – salt and pepper vodka martini with a tomato in it. Purely delicious. I highly recommend it. Then after the Speakeasy, I was easily persuaded back to his place, the aforementioned great condo building and studio apartment within.

That was a Thursday. Saturday, I CALLED him after a victorious TCU football game and invited him out with my friends. Hey, I met his. He can meet some of mine. I was vague as to where we were going, just said he should join us in the East Village. Well, we ended up at a K-Pop Karaoke bar in the East Village. The fact that I invited a guy to sing karaoke with me gives and idea on the amount of beverages I had indulged in during the game. Lo and behold, Major showed up! I felt we had a great time! He even sang some songs. Definitely a Bass singer. Went well with my Soprano self. Surely, I was intoxicated with vodka and likeness for him. After we got back to his place (where he made me what he claimed is one of George W. Bush’s favorite drinks) and discussed politics, family and life, we both expressed “I like you.” This was adorable and I thought finally, a man who can express feelings and also the fact that we shared mutual feelings was blissful and rare.

This was all three weeks ago. What’s the latest? Nothing. Absolutely no word from him. I called him that Sunday and no answer. He didn’t seem like the type of guy not to acknowledge a call. We texted briefly on Halloween and the Saturday after. I dressed as OkCupid for Halloween and on our first date he was interested in my costume, so I shared it with him. Saturday was two brief texts about college football and notta. In his defense, Major told me during our very first phone call that he felt back because he was going to be leaving for a few days starting the Tuesday after we first met, Oct 28. He stated he was going to Virginia and then to Europe. When we bid farewell I wished him a good, safe trip. We kissed goodbye and parted ways. I walked through Central Park home and figured we would keep in touch. After all, he SAID he liked me, right? And, I really liked him and was looking forward to seeing where things would go.

So, that is my theory in all this? I believe there is another woman. Perhaps even a wife. Major is major-ly married in my mind. When something is too good to be true it usually is. Also, as part of my theory, he is in the military. Men in the military typically are settled down before 32. Also, when thinking about it, his studio apartment was not personalized. No pictures of people, and very basic. Either his personality was as vanilla as his decor and “certain skills” or it was a temporary living arrangement. My thought, is the latter, and that he has a wife, fiance, girlfriend in Virginia or even back in Europe. True or not, I have not heard from him and I definitely refrained from contacting him after the college football text conversation. Then, last night, I had that dream.

Perhaps my karaoke singing sent him away. But, even if he is legitimately single, this is easy for me to move on from anyway. To quote Candace Bushnell with Samantha Jones from “Sex and the City” – “You know what they say. Good on paper. Bad in bed.” Amen, Samantha. Amen.