They say it takes 21 days to make a habit. This saying is in reference to dieting, working out, etc but I wonder if it applies to dating as well. If you make it to 21 days of seeing someone does that therefore make them a habit? You’ve gotten used to each other. The initial get to know you facts are out of the way. But, does the woo phase go away at this point where you two have become a habit in each other’s lives? This is always contingent on the couple and the individual personalities. I think the form of woo just changes. It becomes less superficial and more in depth. It can go from a goofy “thinking about you” picture to questions to get to know your family and investing in your health and background. But you still get butterflies and do a little “woo-hoo!” in your mind when you see their name pop up on their phone.

The first three weeks with Mister Man might as well have been a Nicholas Sparks mini-novel. I never experienced someone so thoughtful, kind and supportive. I could completely be myself with him and same with him being himself with me. I would tell my friends things he did and they had to hold down the vomit. From doing sit ups with kisses at the top to sending the cheesiest of texts and snaps. I was head over boots and my friends heads were between their boots.

We went on our first official date that Sunday after we met, just like I had put in our calendars. He picked out a place with plenty of gluten-free options and drove down from CT to spend the evening with me. He was so handsome pulling up in his white car. It might as well have been a white horse. And wow, did he smell amaze-balls and his shirt was purple – my favorite color, which he knew.

We went to Heidi’s House, which he picked for their gluten-free options. So considerate and one of my favorite spots. The meal was delicious. The bottle of wine was delicious. And the game of Battleship was devious since he let me win! That was a moment for me. A moment of selflessness and how nice it feels to have someone truly care about you. The night ended with another innocent night over and early morning departure, but the butterflies stayed.

The following week was almost torture not being able to see him but we stayed in touch with the cheesiest of snaps and texts. My heart would light up along with my phone when I saw his name pop up. The following weekend he was moving so I offered to go to CT for the first time. I’ve dated people on the MetroNorth before and hated it but now I don’t hate getting on that train. I’m happy to hop on it, even on a work night. I went up late Saturday afternoon after a bottomless Sangria brunch with my friends. Mister Man and I had dinner at BANC House. Tons of BBQ (he knows I’m a Texas girl!) and oysters. Those oysters. That night. Wow. The following morning, that’s when I started to really fall for this guy. He bought gluten-free Bisquick to make us a delicious breakfast. Little did I know this was the first of many delicious meals. Mister Man is quite the cook! Dining out became a thing of the past for me. I attribute this to my healthier lifestyle as well.

Then I was gone for a week and a half in Austin, TX. We talked continuously. We were both really sad about me going away for a while and not seeing each other. I was mad because I knew the infamous LA guy was going to be in Austin, TX as well. He pretty much made fun of me when I told him I was seeing someone. I ignored him and went on to my drunk dialing to Mister Man. While away, social media issues arose and we even had a healthy conversation over my concerns. I had never had someone been so responsive and communicate well to a question. I was pleased and definitely would “love” that status. Coming back from TX, I was delayed 9 hours. I was so excited to spend Memorial Day weekend with Mister Man and he had a meal all prepared for my arrival but I ended up not getting in until 10pm. We ordered pizza. Gluten-free of course. We had a great weekend cooking, grilling and Netflix and chilling. Heavy on the chill. And the chill has been the hottest of my life.

The distance has never been a problem. The commute is almost easier and definitely more enjoyable. Mister Man has been so motivating in me bettering my life in so many aspects such as fitness and diet. I’ve lost 20 pounds since being with Mister Man. I’m excited to share my workouts with him, such as hitting my running goal of being under 30 minutes for a 5K, and healthy eating choices. I love that he isn’t much of a drinker. I don’t miss the hangovers. I just miss him when I’m not with him. Since these first few weeks we see each other pretty consistently. Most weekends are spent in CT at the beach or in NYC on boats with food and drinks. We even went up to a beautiful beach in Rhode Island to spend a summer day. The first 21 days were especially magical and I hope that spark never fades. Just like a current popular song, “Don’t need no butterflies when you give me the whole damn zoo.”

PSA: I’m officially a BeachBody Coach so if you’re interested in learning more about how I’ve lost 20 pounds in about three months, send me a message or comment below! 🙂 

 

 

Something magical. I’m now a believer in the saying that it happens when you least expect it. One of my favorite quotes is, “Life is like a butterfly. You can chase it or let it come to you.”

It was early May and I was about to go to Chicago on my first Manager’s Retreat. I had just gotten promoted at work and was so excited. My energy was on the highest levels and I felt on top of the world. I had deleted my dating apps a few weeks prior and didn’t even miss them. I decided it was time to focus on my job. I didn’t need or want a man anymore. I went to this retreat with the mindset that I would meet and hang out with managers I wouldn’t normally get the chance to talk to. There were about 120 people and it was a very enriching week. I met managers from Tokyo, Dublin, Toronto; different departments, all over. I was in bed each night at 10:00 a.m. and so refreshed for our events each day when you could see the glaze of hangover on some other’s faces who had went out the night before. I didn’t build any best friend bonds during this trip. No one was inviting me to have wine in their hotel room and when I went to hotel bar to scope it out and chat with more people I even had a table say were in a deep conversation — insinuating for me to not sit with them. I felt lonely on this trip. Some managers were brand new like me but already had good friends. Others had been managers for years and already had strong bonds. I pretty much was a loner for once in my life and you know what? It was bittersweet.

The final night of the retreat came and we had Oz the Mentalist as our performer. Some new faces to me went up as he pre-recorded their favorite numbers, what they were wearing and decisions they would make. It was an entertaining evening for sure. The next day we all boarded our flights at O’Hare at different times. As far as I was concerned I was the only one on my flight and shared a cab with some teammates from my department to get there early. Thank God I did as the TSA line ended up being 90 minutes long. Not only was it long but when I got my ID checked they wouldn’t take it because it was cracked. They also didn’t care for my passport because it wasn’t signed. I was lucky I got on this plane. I just wanted to go home. In the midst of the TSA line I saw a familiar face though. It was one of the guys that went up with the Mentalist. He was the one that guessed what the Mentalist bought his sister and then the Mentalist had pre-recorded her choice as well as what he was wearing: a blue/orange striped shirt, jeans and white Adidas. He recognized me (or just my Indeed suitcase) as well and we immediately talked about the Mentalist and realized we were on the same flight. We were both happy we got to the airport early since the TSA line was atrocious.

After I finally got through TSA I noticed there was an earlier flight. I rushed to that gate to try and grab it but there were 50 people on standby so that wasn’t working in my favor. I moseyed over to the gate of my booked flight and hoped to see Mentalist Man at the gate and hoped that he would be up for a drink because it had been A DAY. Not more than five seconds later he walked up. I definitely found him attractive in the TSA line but now that we were out of that nonsense I could see that wow, this guy really is attractive. He was totally up for a drink and was going to ask me the same. We went to Bubbles and talked about the retreat while we waited for our flight. I enjoyed some Prosecco and he enjoyed some Sam Adams. Conversation was flowing and bubbly. I purposely planted my name so he would know it (and he was later glad I did) and he did the same. Although, he had to repeat his last name a few times for me I finally got it.

We didn’t want the conversation to end so we made a plan of attack to sit together on the plane. I was 13A and he was 29A. Essentially, we just had to find 29B. Who doesn’t want to move up to a window seat at the front of the plane?? We walked up to the gate and I excitedly said in a normal voice “now to find 29B!” And, there she was. Within five feet of us. We were both shocked but happy. She was with a friend and after bartering with some wine, we split up the friends, gave her the window seat and I ended up in the back of the plane in 29B and him 29C. The flight continued with nonstop talk and more wine and beer. Conversation became more personal and we ventured out from talk about the retreat and got to know each other. It was wild how everything was working out.

We ended up sharing a cab into the city. He lived in CT and couldn’t get an Uber so I suggested Ubering to the city with me and then taking MetroNorth. When we got to my place, the new bar below me, Ethyl’s had just opened. We had to go. Or, I forced us to go. So, we dropped off our luggage in my lobby and off to free drinks and burlesque dancers we went. We had a really good time. He opened up to me and I learned a lot about him. Him and I were both dream chasers with him moving to the states and me moving to NYC. We didn’t have the same personality types from our retreat tests but they were definitely complimentary. I was an extrovert to his introvert. We had our first kiss on my rooftop and he innocently stayed over and left early the next morning. Work was a little tough for both of us but it was at least a Friday. At Ethyl’s we made plans to see each other on Sunday. Everything he said was so perfect, our time was magical and I felt like I was in a dream.

We received these cards at retreat for us to write a promise to ourselves. The card read “____ because I said I would.” In addition to this day full of unexpected surprises, he pulled his out at the end of the night and wrote on it and gave it to me: “I’m going to make the most out of this because I said I would.”